May 14, 2004


The Group W Bench

The new definition of "Cannon Fodder".

The folks lining up at KBR's Houston training center are not worried about these billions or millions. They are happy to get off with a few thousand bucks. In the Iraq gold rush, you sign for a one-year contract - renewable pending your qualifications and endurance. Basic salaries are equivalent for comparable jobs in the US - but become three times as fat because of the bonuses related to the dangers implied. A health plan and a $50,000 life insurance is included. The first $80,000 is tax-free - as long as you remain in Iraq for at least 330 days. And if you get killed, the significant other gets half a salary for life.

Who wants these jobs? The great majority are divorced, have held plenty of jobs before, are used to living near the desert, must pay outstanding debts and, in most cases, want to get a shot at saving and maybe opening their own businesses. There are not many PhD holders in the bunch. Truck drivers, cooks and housing managers are in high demand.

And who ever says that Art does not reflect life? Arlo Guthrie only thought he made up the "Group W" bench...
The gold rush involves passing a first-step screening - which can be on the phone or live with one of dozens of KBR traveling salesmen all across the US. If you have a criminal record, however minor, you're out, says a black man trying to work as a security guard who once got a drunk-driving conviction.
I guess he asked for the wrong job, he could have either been Preznit or an interrogator...

You have to wonder if there isn't something to this question...

One wonders, had more Iraqis been given similar job opportunities, whether the United States could have avoided a catastrophic war on both the Sunni and Shi'ite fronts.
A valid question, but how could they ever effectively screen them for torturers and drunk drivers?


And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! And
they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the
bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly
'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me
and said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench
there, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I
said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand,
and we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing,
father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the
bench. And everything was fine, we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of
things, until the Sargeant came over, had some paper in his hand, held it
up and said.
...

("KID, HAVE YOU REHABILITATED YOURSELF?")

I went over to the sargent, said, "Sargeant, you got a lot a damn gall to
ask me if I've rehabilitated myself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm
sittin' here on the bench, I mean I'm sittin here on the Group W bench
'cause you want to know if I'm moral enough join the army, burn women,
kids, houses and villages after bein' a litterbug." He looked at me and
said, "Kid, we don't like your kind, and we're gonna send you fingerprints
off to Washington."

And friends, somewhere in Washington enshrined in some little folder, is a
study in black and white of my fingerprints.

Had to do it.

Apologies to Arlo...but it's a pretty fair use of his stuff I think in light of what's happening...thanks, man. It's still great, timeless...a classic. Sorry we had to have another war to bring it up again.

posted by Jo Fish on 05.14.04 at 12:00 AM





Comments:

Are we gonna see see 27 8x10 color glossy photos with circles and arrows presented to the blind old fools on the Supremacy Court?

posted by: Lurch on 05.14.04 at 01:08 AM [permalink]



Geez, We're all due some serious flash backs here, right? Have you still got some seeds 'n dust in your albums? Hmmm?

posted by: VJ on 05.14.04 at 04:11 AM [permalink]



You can get anything you want at the Palaces restaurant... aka Bremer's spread. Nice visit RUmmy. Break the champaign,and snort caviar off the whore's ass while you're there. No plastic turkeee though.

"Ya know, the last time I was here Saddam knew how to party... and his interrogation tapes were much more fun also!"

posted by: Mr.Murder on 05.14.04 at 06:49 AM [permalink]



Ah, memories. I think the dust blew off my albums years ago. Their Satanic Majesties Request was the one I usually used. Or that Grateful Dead album, the one with Bertha and Friend of the Devil on it.

I have a good friend who has been out of work for a year. He's a technical writer with two decades of experience and a lot of technical training in programming and networking. He's a great guy, a talented writer, a good worker. He's also out of benefits and living with his mom. He mentioned going to Iraq to drive a truck. I think the Berg video has changed his mind. I hope it has.

What I don't get are the comments I've seen that the media is somehow anti-Bush because they show the prison pictures but not the Berg video. There's some tortured logic that goes along with that that doesn't make any sense.

posted by: dean on 05.14.04 at 08:54 AM [permalink]



dean, it makes perfect sense. The torture photos make Bush and his minions look bad. Therefore, showing them is anti-Bush.
Showing the beheading - and given a lot of the very wierd, Graham Green/John Lecarre sh't that is coming to the light now concerning Mr. Berg's last weeks, that *is* the operative word at present, because there is both electronic and forensic doubt being raised as to whether it actually shows his *killing* - of Nicholas Berg would serve to inflame public opinion against all Arabs indiscriminately and boost support for the war. Since Bush == the War on Terra, not boosting the war is attacking Bush.

I hear via dKos and Eschaton that freepers are now attacking Berg's father and saying that Berg *deserved* to die for having a liberal, anti-Bush, anti-War parent.

I haven't had the nerve to verify this myself. But i don't doubt it really.

Yes, it's horrible to see what we all knew lurked under the skin of Limbutt and his cohorts - but it's good that the death's head has come out at last. "Haha, we were only joking, you silly scaredy-cat liberals," won't cut it this time.

posted by: bellatrys on 05.14.04 at 05:55 PM [permalink]



Ah, I see now. Bush = All That is Good and Not Bush = All That is Bad. Just drink the Kool-Aid darling. You'll feel so much better. Must...drink...Kool-Aid.

Got an email from an unknown party this evening. Hesitated to read it because of viruses and all. But I just updated my definitions yesterday, including Sasser, so I looked at it. It said something like "If you doubt the connection between Iraq and Al Qaeda, look here" (I have taken the linerty of spelling the misspelled words correctly), then there was a link. I've read about some new viruses that require you to follow a link. It was signed something like Sam Grammercy, Colorado National Guard. I did not click the link. I deleted it. Could be a virus, then again maybe not, but I don't know whoever it is so I won't go there. But this is why I am now using a fake email address when I comment on blogs that require an email address.

posted by: dean on 05.14.04 at 08:28 PM [permalink]



"liberty", not "linerty". Have to remember to edit.

posted by: dean on 05.14.04 at 08:29 PM [permalink]



Had someone try to hack me like so as well, comes with the terriroty. My comp will shut down first on most occasions. Loses its entire connect.

Someone freeped a few bookmarks on one occasion, think it was everything I stored back to the point their original message was sent...

If they get to a level that my comments are considered enough merit to warrant a hack it just reinforces my rants hit the right nerve.

All it does is inspire one to look further. It's rea;lly simple. Google names you know, find who they share interest with, google those names.... dots connected all over the place from threon.

posted by: Mr.Murder on 05.17.04 at 09:56 PM [permalink]



:( sorry no spellcheck, bad turkee post...

posted by: Mr.Murder on 05.17.04 at 09:57 PM [permalink]






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All the original material © 2002-2003 Jo Fish
steal what you want, all I ask is an attribution of some sort
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