Catalog Note: offered Fall term 2006 only instr: Staff
An overview of contemporary and unlikely threats to American citizens too afraid of their own shadows to go out at noon. Emphasis will be given to distorting facts, making the media believe everything at the risk of being denounced as "unpatriotic" and methodologies for driving poll numbers via threat levels and Fox News. 1 credit, seminar. Prerequisites: Ohio Political Thuggery 101, Scaremongering 101, Three-card monte 101.
Seems that the Kids of the Fall are at it again. An election coming up, and it's time to ratchet up the sphincters of the clueless sheeple with talk of "sixteen days" to Nukular Armageddon at the hands of those whacky Muslims. Apparently Karl needs Preznit Rexall Wrangler to get his war on again to make sure that the elections get delivered in a timely manner, thus keeping promises of graft, corruption, cronyism and incompetance alive. Keeping hope alive...for CheneyBurton, that's it!
The Wingnut Post, which once had an editor and now has Fred Hiatt featured this piece from a remarkably reliable republican Neocon, Mark Helprin, a fellow at the incredibly unbiased Claremont Institute (yes, I was laughing while I wrote that).
...But with an intermediate-range strategic nuclear capacity, it could deter American intervention, ...
If it were not for that one phrase, I think Helprin almost makes it seem like he's yet another rat deserting the sinking ship of the failed foreign policy of the 1600 Crew. But no, he tosses it in up front where it's guaranteed to color the rest of his editorial.
And he still believes in the tooth-fairy and Easter bunny:
The obvious option is an aerial campaign to divest Iran of its nuclear potential: i.e., clear the Persian Gulf of Iranian naval forces, scrub anti-ship missiles from the shore and lay open antiaircraft-free corridors to each target. With the furious capacity of its new weapons, the United States can accomplish this readily.
Yeah, candy and flowers, Mark baby, candy and flowers.
In that time, we would do well to strengthen -- in numbers and mass as well as quality -- the means with which we fight, to reinforce the fleet train with which to supply the fighting lines, and to plan for a land route from the Mediterranean across Israel and Jordan to the Tigris and Euphrates. And even if we cannot extricate ourselves from nation-building and counterinsurgency in Iraq, we must have a plan for remounting the army there so that it can fight and maneuver as it was born to do.
Well, with the kind of numbers it would take to accomplish that little task, building a supply-chain all the way from the Med to Iran, you might want to start calling those college republicans to enlist now, because it's going to be quite an effort. See: German operations into Russia in winter for a reference on that subject and look how well that turned out for their Messianic leader.
Then Helprin goes off the reservation;
Our problem in Iraq has been delusion and lack of foresight.
Well, there goes your auto-penned Holiday Card from the First Idiot and Mrs. Xanax.
posted by Jo Fish on 04.13.06 at 07:48 PM
Comments:
German operations into Russia...
My grandfather was on the wrong side of that. He told me stories before he died, not of the Russian winter but the spring, when the snow melted and even tracked vehicles got stuck in the gooey, sticky mud. As they ran for their lives, they'd just shoot their artillery horses when they got stuck. The only time I saw my grandfather cry was when he spoke of Russia.
